Alone....

"We're all in this alone." -  Lily Tomlin

Probably the policeman in this news piece felt that way (i.e. being alone).

Read it for yourself at - http://www.dnaindia.com/report.asp?newsid=1209712

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Consensus v/s complete agreement

"You don't have to see eye to eye to walk hand in hand." Rick Warren - pastor and public speaker

This is a fairly recent quote. Rick Warren, who has been invited by president elect Obama, to deliver invocation address at the time of Obama's inauguration, said this. People criticized Obama for inviting Warren because Warren does not approve of same-sex marriages. He also does not endorse many policies of democrats. Warren is famous for his insightful comments was ready with a great quotation to drive home this  important point. Great quotation.

It will be so nice if we also can learn from this quotation. It is only natural that we do not agree with each other on everything. But, that is not a reason not to cooperate and support each other. We can always find  common ground on many things and forget or put our differences on the back burner for greater good.

Many times we tend to mistakenly think that 'consensus' mean complete agreement. It does not have to mean complete agreement. It many times does not. Then what does consensus mean? Consensus simply means that 'I have heard your point of view. I acknowledge it and support it.' That's it. Supporting something does not require full agreement. It only requires complete commitment.

Understanding this meaning of consensus is very important in our days of consensus based decision making. I think we all agree that command and control type of management is no more in vogue. At least not in corporate world. With knowledge based economy, expecting other smart professionals to heed to your command is a totally wasteful activity. On the other hand, we can not also afford to deliberate for too long to reach  absolute agreement from all parties. What we can do is - to make the best possible presentation of our ideas, present our side very persuasively and then drive to consensus (i.e. above given definition).

One very useful technique to obtain consensus is called 'Fist of five'. It's a very simple technique and can be used in almost any scenario where you need to put an idea for discussion and get some decision made.

For more details about fist of five, you can refer to - http://www.freechild.org/Firestarter/Fist2Five.htm. There are many such places on the web which describe the technique very well.

Basically, process is simple. You ask the participants to indicate their level of agreement to an idea by raising the number of fingers.

From the above link, the details:

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Fist (no fingers raised)

A no vote - a way to block consensus. I need to talk more on the proposal and require changes for it to pass.

1 Finger

I still need to discuss certain issues and suggest changes that should be made.

2 Fingers

I am more comfortable with the proposal but would like to discuss some minor issues.

3 Fingers

I’m not in total agreement but feel comfortable to let this decision or a proposal pass without further discussion.

4 Fingers

I think it’s a good idea/decision and will work for it.

5 Fingers

It’s a great idea and I will be one of the leaders in implementing it.

If anyone holds up fewer than three fingers, they should be given the opportunity to state their objections and the team should address their concerns. Teams continue the Fist-to-Five process until they achieve consensus (a minimum of three fingers or higher) or determine they must move on to the next issue.)

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This is a great technique for decision making process. You need to worry only about a few folks who may have raised 1 or 2 fingers Even if there are many people who do not agree, you get a real good feel for where you stand with your idea. This also does not result in majority overriding the minority.

Of course, there may be some people who can not be convinced at all to come at least to the level of three fingers. Then there is a stalemate. You may need to use some other technique or look really hard at the merits of your idea or if everyone else agrees and the disagreeing member(s) are seen as detractors without merit, you may need to kick them out from your team.

Fist of five is a great technique. Agile teams use this for all purposes. Try it with your team and you will love it.

Cheers!

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Getting up

"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in getting up every time we do." - Confucius

Another similar quotation - "best way to recover from a fall while riding a horse is to get back on one (horse) right away."

I think we have lot to learn from babies. Babies, as part of their learning process, tumble, fall and when left to themselves, get themselves up and continue. At the same time, if anyone shows a visible concern, they start crying. They forget their auto-programmed response when someone shows a concern. Instead of getting themselves up after a fall, babies get confused by the concern shown by elders and start crying.

Same thing happens to adults also. Most of us seem to do well when we are left alone or in the company of 'mature' adults when we are going through some problems. Worst people to have around when we are dealing with a crisis are those with fear complex. They are more panicky than we are and make our condition worse. If you are sensible, when someone tells you that they have a problem, all you need to ask is 'how can I help?'. That's it. Do not ever try to offer advice and suggestions when the person going through the crisis has not yet figured out what the real problem is. If you know you get worried about someone's problem, leave the person alone. Once the person has figured out what his problem is, he can ask you for advice and you can offer all that you have to offer.

Soldiers returning from active duty were found to have a lot of problems. Mostly psychological. Initially doctors thought it was the trauma during the war that was the root cause of their problems. It was true to some extent. But, later they figured out, it was also due to the fact that soldiers were only partly occupied when they came back from active duty. It was lack of full involvement in some activity which caused them more problems than trauma suffered during the war. So, they devised what they called 'work therapy' or keeping them busy. Soldiers who came back from duty were let to unite with families on the base but were strongly discouraged to take time off unless they were physically hurt and needed to rest. Else, they were put on a full day regimen of work which included standard schedule of drills, on-the-base work, helping the community etc. Objective was to wear them out completely during the day so that they did not think and think themselves to getting sick. Work therapy works marvels for anyone. Less you think during the time of crisis is better. More you act opens up the possibilities. This is not to mean that you simply act recklessly and put yourselves in more precarious condition but you start doing something instead of analysis to paralysis. It is the action which gets you closer to solution to your problems than mere thinking.

Cheers!

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Real Strength

"Real strength is not just a condition of one's muscle, but a tenderness in one's spirit." - McCallister Dodds

This was not the exact picture I was looking for. But, this comes close enough. A gentle baby happily cradling in the giant arms of a wrestler was the picture that came to my mind as I thought about this quotation.

Another incident that comes to mind is the end of one of India-Pakistan wars. If you see the surrendering ceremony of Pakistan, you will how well it was handled. The surrendering Pakistani general and his troops were received in their full uniforms with all respect, given all privileges and when they signed off on official surrendering papers, their admiration for their victors was so well obvious on their faces.

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Is it the mountain or the grain of sand in your shoe?

"Be master of your petty annoyances and conserve your energies for the big, worthwhile things. It isn't the mountain ahead that wears you out - it's the grain of sand in your shoe." - Robert Service

Enormity of the mountain that you want to climb may be daunting at the outset but it is going to be that one grain of sand, if in your shoes, is going to give you  hell of a time while climbing that mountain. It may even become the determining factor if you can scale the mountain at all.

This is one of the best quotations that drove home the point perfectly.

You know, I have observed one thing. Many times it is the clutter on our work area that discourages us from starting the project. As soon as you clear the clutter and organize your work area, you somehow feel motivated to start the project. Take care of small things and bigger things start taking care of themselves. Small things when done well lead to good results. Good result is not a small thing.

"Don't sweat the small stuff. It's all the small stuff." - Ignore, attend to and do whatever necessary to take care of minor issues first. Without such things out of your way, nothing significant is going to happen. It is also a good way to remember this quotation while doing retrospection or analyzing something that is not going well.

Cheers!

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