If we cannot end now our differences, at least we can help make the world safe for diversity.
John F. Kennedy (1917 - 1963)
John F. Kennedy (1917 - 1963)
When we are argue, how often do we argue over facts? More often than not, we try to argue on our dear opinions. After a while we totally tune out and we are no more arguing on anything. We are totally focused on the person with whom we were arguing. Tthe person becomes the object of all our attention. This is one of the reasons why problems get only worse when immature people try to solve them by discussion.
First of all, it is most important to realize and affirm that the problem that you are trying to solve is the common enemy and not each of you. We are on the same side. Problem is on the other side. As soon as we recognize this fact, so many things change. Even if one of the parties realizes and acknowledges this, we are that much closer to resolving the problem. This is because the person who develops such an insight tries and many times succeeds in building consensus and solving the problem. More this is done, people slowly notice and absorb best practices.
First of all, it is most important to realize and affirm that the problem that you are trying to solve is the common enemy and not each of you. We are on the same side. Problem is on the other side. As soon as we recognize this fact, so many things change. Even if one of the parties realizes and acknowledges this, we are that much closer to resolving the problem. This is because the person who develops such an insight tries and many times succeeds in building consensus and solving the problem. More this is done, people slowly notice and absorb best practices.
Problem solving should never be a win lose situation. It should be a win win situation or lose lose situation. If both parties have to sacrifice to solve a problem, it is worth it. Problem is solved but we lost something in the process. When Gandhi and others yielded to the partition of India and Pakistan, it was intended as something to solve the problem even if it meant both countries losing something in the process. Unfortunately things did not go as planned but and we lost and also problem was never solved.
Many times people of later generations put a blanket blame on leaders of those time for all the problems of today. I think the movie 'Sardar' starring Paresh Rawal (as Sardar Vallbh Bhai Patel) depicts the situation at time very well. It goes into details as under what circumstances decisions were taken and how they felt utterly optionless. It is really touching when Sardar Patel anticipates the criticism of today and hope people take time to review their decisions.
"Separate people from the problem."
"Problem is one side and people trying to solve it are on the other."
Cheers!
Powered by Qumana
No comments:
Post a Comment